23 June 2009

"oh waiter ... a side order of crow, please"

Well, it figures. As soon as a girl goes & makes a stand about something, it bites her in the butt. In this case, my dear fiance is the one biting me in the ... wait, that doesn't sound right. Dammit. Allow me to explain:

In one of those role-reversals that never cease to amuse, Mr. UB is now on a strict diet until the wedding. I had nothing to do with it, I swear. Not only do I stand by everything I said in my rant on the subject as applicable to both genders ... but he gets to wear a suit at the wedding. Or a tux -- we haven't gotten to the details of that part yet. But either way: a freakin' suit. There is not a single garment in the female fashion world that is as instantly elegant, sexy and forgiving as a suit is for a guy. Seriously, it's not fair.

Nevertheless, he's decided that he feels a little doughy in places, and he's on a diet & workout regimen that smells vaguely of bootcamp, in my opinion. I don't mind -- in fact, one of my favorite things about him is that when something bothers him, he takes action to change it. But if he thinks that I won't be holding him to my "as long as you intend to keep those new habits after the big party" rule, well ... ahem.

Meanwhile, I'm sticking to my current regimen of donuts & milkshakes. Yes, I work out for a living. No, it's not fair. But a) my dress fits, and b) did I mention he gets to wear a suit?!?


Anonymous said...

you need the perfect lil "black" dress.. it is soooo much better than any suit could ever be!

Mr.Un-Bride said...

To be fair, I used to be in absurdly good shape, and now I'm not, and I miss it. Plus, I promised to do a David Beckham costume for Halloween.

And frankly, I don't think "no soda or junk food" counts as an absurd diet.

"Dromma" - Drama, whenever a true Drama Queen pronounces it.

samantha said...

Mr. UB, I am joining you on the diet wagon - mexico was not kind to my waistline as well, and since I have eyed a perfect LBD for your funfest, I damn well better be able to get myself to fit in it!

un-bride said...

@Samantha: I give up! I'm freakin' surrounded. More cake for me!!